Monday, May 23, 2016

Special Praise

I did this poem at the Good News Christian A Cappella Concert this past semester. I wrote it piece by piece throughout the year, poetry is something I do sort of sporadically. Regardless, I think this poem showcases a huge part of who I am and how I see the world. I encourage you to take four minutes and watch!



Thursday, May 19, 2016

Slight shift in direction. This blog is for the people reading it, not for me to write. I think that the personal thoughts I have are going to be between me and God. I have a journal for that, and I am sure that it will be full by the end of this summer of the times that I encounter God. Trust me, I know that I will be raw with him. This summer is going to be hard, but I don't think this blog is the place to vent and complain to the world. No one likes to read that, and I hope that I don't write that.  No one has seen the page at the time I am writing this, the only page views has been me checking the page to see if I like the formatting. Maybe soon it will be updated weekly, if I can fall into a rhythm with that.

Just another thing to get in the habit of. Summer seems to be a great time to start new habits. I am starting this blog, trying to read my Bible and pray everyday, and I just started running yesterday afternoon. If only one of them sticks, I hope it is the prayer. I have time right now for all of these. Well I think.

The trouble with summer vacation is that it reeks of idleness. That line from the Music Man, "An idle mind is the Devil's playground", definitely has something to it. Even if you set your own goals, it is hard to attack them if you don't set structure for it. That's the adjustment coming from a college year of penultimate structure. Even if I didn't have class, I assigned each free time a task to complete, whether it was cranking out a paper, meeting up with a friend, planning a date, or watching a movie. And that was easy as long as there was something to plan around. Days with large breaks are the hardest to plan. And that is exactly what a summer day is, a large chunk of nothing with an infinite number of shapes and sizes of Tetriminos (Tetris blocks) falling into place. And the college student within me tirelessly tries to ensure there are no empty spaces when the day is over. There is no carefree summer here, not in my own little world. 

Ok, taking a step back. This helpless feeling is not coming from God. This feeling comes from the lie that I have to constantly striving, or I will be a failure. It's one that I wrestle with often, a strategic flaming arrow the evil one is pummeling me with (see Ephesians 6:16). So, as taught by Roger Hershey down in Panama City Beach this past March, I say No. That is not true. Jesus constantly withdrew from ministry to rest and communicate with his Father. Romans 8:1 says there is now condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 says that Jesus' power is made perfect in weakness, so that when I am weak, he is strong. I don't have to be the strong, successful one. Jesus has made me strong. I don't have to prove it to anyone else, or to myself, it has already been done.

There are things I don't have control over this summer. I don't have anyone to take a lease off of my hands for next year yet, I don't have control over what this summer will be like, I don't have control over whether I will have a job in Chicago in the nursing field by the time I get there, or at all. All of these thing scare me. And that is because I only trust my hands to carry my life. But God's hands are so much stronger, gentler, careful. He won't drop me. He won't forget about me, He never has, and he never will. 

Those blank spaces in Tetris are important if you are trying to win the game. They don't matter if the game has already been won. 

Prayer Requests:
  • That I would be offered a job as a nursing assistant in a clinical setting
  • That God would be teaching me how to rest in him and his victory
  • That I would be able to find someone to take over my '16-'17 lease, that God would use the men in that apartment to reach out to him with the Gospel if he is an unbeliever
  • For good health leading up to and through Chicago for all of the students who are attending
  • For clarity in seeing what thoughts are from God and what thoughts are from the enemy
Two Weeks and a Day until Arrival

Saturday, May 14, 2016

Well, let's give this a shot! I have heard of people writing a blog, documenting their summer mission. I don't think I am doing it for the people reading it, but for me and my own processing and development. Of course, if people are going to read this, I'll leave it up to God to see if my trials and tribulations will affect the other people. But I imagine I will be very candid. This first post is just to see how this thing works, but the next posts will be about my life and my experiences. Some of you reading this know me well, and some of you know me more than well. Hopefully you all can join me on this journey, and in it learn more about both me and the God that I will be serving this summer.

Right now, I am almost done support raising, praise God! I think when all of the people who have pledged money find time to give, they will meet my goal of $3,700. 

Next step, find a job in a hospital. Wish me luck!